Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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