i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
