Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
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