His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Sorry my hands just texted you
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
