i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
