I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
