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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
