went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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