So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
