honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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