I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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