She said her name was "party"
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize