i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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