just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
