Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize