just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
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