my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize