I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
How many fucks given?
0.12846
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
