Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Randomize
