Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
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