On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
