Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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