I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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