garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
