Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
the liver wants what the liver wants
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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