sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize
