we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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