he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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