I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
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