It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
17 year olds will be the death of me.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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