I'd wear matching sweaters with you
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
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