lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
