fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
