Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize
