is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
