think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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