All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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