That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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