Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
two words...techno handjob
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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