gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I hate all girls vehemently.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize