I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize