when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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