Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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