Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
He has the fingertips of a God
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