Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
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