So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Randomize
