i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize