your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
