real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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