do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
