we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
