so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
